Harper Names New Cabinet
By Sally Purple

Last Thursday, Prime Minister Stephen Harper unveiled the new Canadian Ministry -- there were some major changes. Most notably, Canada's new old cabinet now features a significantly larger number of women, as well as more ministers from Ontario. Most of the prominent MP's from Harper's first Ministry either stayed in place or were shuffled to different jobs. After swearing their oaths and posing for photographs, the Cabinet Ministers were led to a secret underground location and were placed under lock and key. They are not expected to be heard from again, barring the hypothetical scenario in which they would participate in another Ministry unveiling ceremony at some point in the future.